Suzan Bond

I started a new gig last week. My first day was very successful. Remembered everyone's name, figured out what the company does  (which is good considering I'm heading up marketing for the company) and…found the bathroom. On the second day I not only found the bathroom…I somehow managed to flush my keycard down the toilet.  Didn't even know it until several minutes after the automatic flusher.

Trying to be smart, I'd placed my keycard on the top of the toilet paper roll so that I would remember it. When I was leaving the stall I must have shot it into the toilet when I put my laptop bag over my shoulder. It didn't even hit the floor. Went straight in. Now that. Is. Talent.

But that wasn't the end of the story.

Did I also mention that it was after hours and everyone had gone?

And that I didn't know how to get out of the building?

And I had to be at dinner 5 minutes ago?

And that I had to call the CEO to get out of the bathroom and the office?

Yep. It was a banner day for showing off my talent. No, not my marketing talent but still–talent is talent right? If there's ever a contest where you need to shoot something backwards into a small hole using a handbag I'm your gal. 

Let's just bask in the glow of my athletic talent. Shall we?

The ubiquity of the social web these days means that crafting a public persona isn't just for celebrities or big brands anymore. If your social presence is something akin to Casper, you might want to keep this in mind. If you think people aren't paying attention to your small startup I have three words for you: Library of Congress. While it might get lost in the 55 million tweets sent each day your personal tweets are still a matter of public record and that means it's searchable. Caring about your public persona also extends into your offline life as well but that's another post for another day.

Going Willy Nilly

We all know those people or businesses who really should do a bit of reputation management. They're the ones come off as very willy nilly in their approach to social matters. They're the ones who send emo tweets or status updates about their terrible past or worse, current employers. The Willy Nilly's are the ones who have public spats on Twitter. Or, announce their break-up with a rant about their ex on Facebook. They're like this guy who goes on an angry rant about a first world problem.

Some use this seeming Willy Nilly approach to great effect becoming digital Pied Pipers with followers avidly waiting their next public break down. Others are less successful. Even though seemingly successful, those Pied Pipers are at risk of doing permanent damage to themselves professionally. When their reputation is at its lowest and professional damage is at it's highest there are a few options to get out of this social maelstrom:

A. Hire someone to do it for them.

B. Declare digital social bankruptcy and start all over again.

C. Not care. Be a social rebel.

Carving As If In Stone

The other side of the social media continuum is just as interesting. I like to call these folks Careful Crafters. They care so much about what other things that sometimes they can come across stiff as an Ironwood tree. Everything is perfect. Their latest crisis is handled with silence or denial. Their inner world might be falling apart but the outside world would never get a whiff of it. Not at least until it's in the distant past–meaning years past. But sometimes being too concerned with your reputation become like handcuffs to that reputation that you're trying so hard to build. When you've tipped over the too overly crafted social media chasm it can make you:

A. Bore people before they're done reading their content.

B. Appear something other than genuine and human.

C. Miss opportunities for connection.

Given my work as a marketing and social strategist, it may be no surprise that I tend to sit towards the middle on the Careful Crafter side of the continuum. My social media communications tend to err on the side of being professional and saying things I wouldn't be afraid to say in front of my mother. I think I've posted one vaguely emo(tional) tweet out of nearly 6,400. While I'm generally happy with this I sometimes wonder if there are hidden costs to this approach. Do I take enough chances? Would I be more successful if I loosened the reigns on my public persona? It's something I'm pondering.

Door #3

Just because you're not a Careful Crafter doesn't automatically make you a Willy Nilly. There are some who just manage their social presence artfully without a great deal of work at it. They seem to sit at the middle of the continuum with ease. I recently had a conversation about reputation management with a friend who is a fairly public person. Managing public reputation wasn't something he had considered which was interesting because his reputation and that of his company are pretty stellar. While I'm not sure there had been nary a thought to this I think it was largely true. I attribute his success to having an innate ability in knowing when to push things, when to hold back and how to have fun while not taking it too far. Door #3 is likely effective but probably not easy for everyone to do effectively. If you can really make this style work I say go for it.

The Balance

If you tend to lie at either end of the social continuum you may want to consider my dad's philosophy:

Your assets in excess become your liabilities

Given this philosophy my dad like to advocate doing things in moderation (and he didn't mean just drinking). But in the social world I wonder. Does a balanced approach really work or, can this stray into the unmemorable category?

So. I'm curious about your reputation management style.

Are you a Willy Nilly or a Careful Crafter? Or are you Door #3?

My dad is an engineer which means he likes to make sure things are perfect. If he could take a side angle to my life to make sure it was perfectly aligned I'm sure he would. So of course, he loves to come up with tidy little aphorisms for his kids. I got this one recently in my birthday card:

It's always darkest before the dawn

While I'm sure he wasn't the originator of this saying, he did popularize it–at least for me. It's a great reminder that sometimes when things are at their breaking point it actually means a transformation is around the corner. Sometimes when things aren't working out as you planned something even better is in store. Like when clients aren't coming in as fast as you wanted but the bills are still due. Or when a situation is breaking down so rapidly that it's clear there isn't a way to save it. I used to dread these. Now I just remind myself that it can get really, really dark just before really good stuff happens.

I'm generally a pretty organized person. A place for everything and everything in its place definitely describes my philosophy. Organized by sleeve length and then by color my closet looks like the stores I used to work in back in my retail days. And I de-clutter on a regular basis in part because organizing relaxes me.

My life was pretty simple but I longed for even more. It lead me to Leo Babauta's new book, The Power of Less. He advocates that you start to simplify one habit at a time.  I've already been doing many of the things on his list except for one glaring omission.

Process your inbox to zero.

This is a tough one for this never-want-to-miss-anything, information sponge connector. It's left me constantly fighting with my inbox. I selected it because it's the #1 tangible thing I complain about most and because it would have a BIG impact in simplifying my life. So I decided to take his 30 Day Power of Less Challenge which means I agreed to Process my inbox to zero daily. Yep, as in everyday.

I am gonna own you inbox!

I've done a few things already to help me win this battle.

• Unnecessary email subscriptions about the latest sales, etc. have been canceled.
• Using HighRise and BaseCamp on a couple of projects so that's definitely helping to keep my to dos and tasks in one place.
• Serendipitously this post from Amber Naslund arrived in my inbox this morning. (It been read AND filed). She uses Gmail features extensively and it's something I'll check out.

How do you quickly and effectively manage YOUR inbox?

While community building has been around as long as our cave dwelling ancestors it's undergone a revival in recent years with the rise of social media. In a more connected world it's both easier–and much harder to build a strong community. People often ask me how I built a strong network–in Boulder within a few months from basically zero and how my Twitter following grew 1000% in less than a year. Let me start with one of the biggest tips.

Don't game the system.

In the Twitter world this looks like following hundreds of people in an attempt to get them to follow you. Once they do–poof! you unfollow them. This is usually done in an attempt to gain followers as well as boost your ratio between followers and following. This is bad, bad, bad. Don't do this. You may build a following in the short term but once people figure out your game you'll lose followers–and credibility. Don't be that guy.

In the professional world this often shows up as  a one-way relationship where you receive or only focus on getting your needs met. You know these people. It's all about me, me, me. And when it's finally your turn it's as if a black hole swallowed them whole and they're off to their next "meeting." Don't do this.  It doesn't engender trust, pisses people off and takes you farther away from your goal. And? When you encounter a professional dark alley like needing a job or new clients–people are much less likely to help you.

So you want to build a strong community?

Take time to understand how the "system" works

and…

complete the cycle of giving and receiving.

P.S. Don't worry. You didn't miss 393 other tips on building community. Since Letterman has already perfected the Top 10 list I thought I'd be just myself and create something different. Which…is a community building tip for another day.

Resolutions became extinct for me a number of years ago. I got tired of laying out sky high goals in a NYE champagne induced fever. That never worked out. Shocked right? Instead I started doing a Theme for the year. This set my intention and focused me without setting unattainable resolutions that only served to make me feel worse about myself when I didn’t reach them.

Please understand. I’m not criticizing you if you make resolutions. I know they work for some people. It’s just that through my work as an Org/Biz Strategist and Executive Coach I’ve spent a lot of time helping people create intentions and set goals. I’ve watched lots (I mean crowds) of people fail at this. In order to reach your goals you need to follow the SMART rule: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-boxed. This is when resolutions are most effective. But what if you want to create a more encompassing transformation? This is where setting a Theme (or Word) for the year works far better.

How does setting a Theme work?

I think back about the previous year–what I’ve transformed and what I’m still longing for. I then come up with a few words that articulate the transformation I’m looking for in the coming year. Usually I start with a couple and then one emerges as the clear winner. Let me give you some examples to illustrate this a bit better. Here are a few of the words I chose for the past year.

2005: Money (self-explanatory)

2oo6: Grown-up (also pretty explanatory)

2007: Love (self and otherwise)

2008: Focus (how I used my energy, thoughts & time)

2009: Freedom

2010: Align

Photo Note: The sign in the photo was made by a dear friend who wanted to give me a reminder of my align theme last year. I highly recommend reminders of the visual and other sort.

Doing a Theme for the year has allowed me to create amazing experiences and growth. When I look back at each year I am amazing and all the transformation. It feels good.

Repeat after me. Themes, not Resolutions. Ready, Set…Transform!

I'm participating in a cool event called Reverb #10.  The goal of this event is to reflect on the past year in order to get clear about what you want to create in the coming year. Being a coach and into all this kind of cool stuff I thought this was a great opportunity to do something online that I normally do just for myself.  So I will be posting on my blog throughout the month of December. I hope you will find it inspiring and useful for you. If you'd like to follow along, feel free to sign up. You can also follow the blog of one of my dear friends, Cali Harris who is a writer, one of the creators of Reverb #10 and an all around cool chick. OK. So on to the first post for Reverb #10. Today I received the first prompt by email from Gwen Bell. Here's what it said. One Word. Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you're choosing that word. Now, imagine it's one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you? I love this prompt. One word is a concept I've been using for a number of years. For those of you who don't know–instead of resolutions I focus on a word for each year. This word is really a theme that I want to focus on for the coming year. My word for 2010 was Align. This year was all about aligning my life with myself, my inner most desires. Although I actually chose it at the end of 2009 (as is my tradition) I feel that it's still the right word. Alignment is something I feel. Because of this alignment I have attracted many wonderful things in my life that I hadn't been able to create. Here are just a few things I've done in the past year–all because I was practicing alignment. – Spoke in front of 900 people at Ignite Boulder. – Helped co-found Fourmile Heroes, an organization whose goal is to thank and provide funds for local Boulder firefighters. We've created a poster and stickers that are for sale with proceeds going to Boulder County Firefighters Association Fund. We also helped organize a parade to honor the firefighters of the Fourmile Fire (most of whom are volunteers).

- Learned how to snowboard–one of the things I wanted to do when I moved to CO. OK–still learning but I'm out there! Photo: My friend Lisa and I hitting slopes at Breck.

- Nabbed my very 1st 14er (actually two in one day) which I wrote about here. – Manifested great clients who are up to cool stuff. – Renewed my passion for travel. I visited: Topanga Canyon (L.A.), Telluride, Aspen, Santa Fe & Taos and Austin. And…I'm off to New York and the Bahamas. Photo: The venerable Continental Club in Austin. Yes–that's a bear singing.

- Started writing again after a very long 5 year absence. This culminated in this blog, writing two other books and selling more copies of my Grow Your Intuition book than ever. – Re-ignited my passion for tech and decided to start my own tech company. Now I'm looking for a tech co-founder and finalizing my idea so I can apply for TechStars next year. Those are just a few highlights of my 2010. Your turn. What's your one word for 2010? As for 2011, I've already selected my word. I'm going to keep it to myself for now. I want to savor 2010 for the moment before I focus on what's next.

Yep. It’s Tuesday in the real world. But on this blog–it’s On My Mind Monday.  Here are your links for the week. Enjoy.

bg Blog: My Week Alone on the Internet
Why: I saw the author, Grant Blakeman speak recently at TedxBoulder about minimalism. (That’s him in the photo to the left.) He continues the good work here with a post on being distracted with what he calls CRS aka Constant-Refresh-Syndrome. This post details his experiment to circumvent this and what he found was that there are distractions everywhere. Insightful read.

The Daily Beast: Is There a Gender Divide in Startups?
Why: After a flurry of articles about where all the women are in tech startups the author herself a tech startup veteran gets to the point about what we should be focusing on. “I could keep writing about the lack of women in tech, but starting a new company sounds like a lot more fun.”

Seth’s Blog: The Fear Tax
Why: Ever the provocateur, Seth Godin does it again with this post. Simply? Fear is one of the biggest things that holds us back from success in business and in life.

Boundaries are very good things. They delineate what’s ok and what isn’t. I always like to say that everyone (adults, children, dogs) needs boundaries. It lets them know where the line is for what’s acceptable. It makes them feel safe. And in some cases, actually makes them safe.

In my work I see many companies with organizational and/or business issues where the lack of strong, articulated boundaries were the culprit. In some cases they didn’t have enough business experience to know what kind to set. In other cases, they had boundaries they wanted to set but didn’t for fear of losing clients or valued staff. Or worse? They set boundaries but then didn’t enforce them. This eroded their credibility and built distrust because others didn’t know what to expect of them. This = not good. The founders became frustrated. Left to the whims of others. And? The business was less profitable.

An epic fail.

When Boundaries are Bad
I’m having a hard time coming up with a time when at least some basic boundaries aren’t good. One of my friends, thinks that not all boundaries are good. Especially in extreme sports.

I think what he’s actually talking about are limits. These, I think, are different than boundaries. You set limits for yourself but boundaries for others. When I’ve been in extreme situations I still have limits. For example, on my first hike up two 14ers in a day my limits were mostly around altitude issues.

If my lungs rattled, down I went.

If I started getting sick to my stomach, it meant stop.

Getting a little frustrated or scared meant I still continued forward. That’s how I got to the top of the mountains safely. I saw some people coming down the mountain who were just wrecked. They either didn’t have limits or, had pushed way past them. I kept thinking we might see a Medevac on the mountain. Not good. Note: The fabulous jumpers in the photo are my friends Betsy Doughty and Emma Nicoletti participating in the Warrior Dash, an extreme running/obstacle course event. Their limit was sticking together through the entire course. They did and both came through the course with their well-being intact.

Although these examples are from the sporting world, it applies to the professional as well. An example is having a limit around how much money and time you’re willing to pump into your business as a new entrepreneur. As I mused on this topic there was a pretty furious volley going on about boundaries on Twitter. Here are some of the juicy tidbits:

@iamkendal: …one area of life tends to reflect others. Even in the extreme sports context, there’s more going on.

@heizusan: I keep my boundaries very broad, but iron-clad steel. You get lots of wiggle room, but 0 tolerance for “leaving the premises”.

@campsteve: People who say they don’t have boundaries don’t know themselves.

I agree with @campsteve’s comment. And? It’s also true about limits. You have to know yourself. Know what’s ok. And…what’s not. To know that you actually have needs that need to be respected in your business, your relationships and with yourself.

If you don’t have boundaries and limits you’ll get hurt in life–metaphorically and literally. The lack of the them can breed frustration and conflict with others if they’re not well set AND articulated.  Pretending you don’t have boundaries or repeatedly ignoring them will raise your cortisol levels. Otherwise known as the stress hormone, elevated levels of cortisol are associated with a weakened immune system, impaired brain function among other yucky stuff you don’t want.

Save yourself from inner and outer conflict and just set some boundaries and limits. Your business will thank you. Your friends, family and colleagues will thank you. Your soul will thank you.

The Equation

Being an engineer, my dad’s pretty much a math genius so even though I’m not I like to express things in terms of equations. So for the math nerds out there here it is:

Boundaries = well-articulated external rules for others

Limits = clear internal rules for yourself

Boundaries + Limits = a well-articulated business and life that supports you. And that = happiness in my book. Without boundaries and limits, life is just a roll of the die.

What kind of boundaries do you have?

What limits do you set for yourself?

Looking at the title of this post you might think it’s New Years. No, you’re not mistaken. We didn’t suddenly fast-forward to the end of the year when most people naturally think about setting goals for the coming one. I’m a fall person. After the more laid-back feel of summer I look forward to August and the months between now and the end of the year. It’s when I have the most energy. It’s when I coalesce what I want the coming year to be about.

I gave up resolutions a number of years ago. They just don’t work for me. Well, for most people either–without the right amount of support and mental change that’s required to make ‘em stick. Instead…

I start with a theme of the year

Last year it was Freedom. Having a theme helps me focus my attention and helps me to set goals. Once I have the theme I start to develop goals. I usually break them down by the quarter since a year is an awfully long time and usually the goals I have in mind are pretty meaty. Having a theme and some specific goals is key.

What I accomplished in 2009:

- Moved to Boulder (with no job and no friends)

- Got back into climbing

- Allowed myself to go to zero (the most amazing freedom I’ve ever felt)

- Finally found work/life balance (HUGE freedom for a recovering Type A)

- Fell in love for the first time in 5 years (it didn’t last but it was glorious)

- Went snowboarding for the first time (and didn’t suck at it)

This Year’s Theme

This year’s word is Alignment.  Going inside out rather than outside in to create a life that really allows me to find (and stay) in my flow. One of my goals for this year was to travel more–something I love but haven’t always made a priority. So far in 2010 I’ve traveled to:

- Aspen

- Austin

- Breckenridge & Frisco

- Los Angeles

- Ouray

- Santa Fe & Taos

- Telluride

Whaddaya think? Are you with me?

Three Quick Steps to Really Change Your Life
1. Develop a theme. (Focus)
2. Write down your goals. (Specificity)
3. Share them publicly. (Accountability)

What’s your theme?

What do you plan to accomplish this month?

This Quarter?

This Year?